Review: Pearl by Deirdre Riordan Hall

Pearl by Deirdre Riordan Hall
Series: Standalone
Published: March 1st, 2016
Publisher: Skyscape
338 pages (ARC)
Genre: Contemporary Young Adult
Acquired this book: From the author in exchange for honest consideration
Warning: May contain spoilers
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Run fast and run far, unless you’re fearless. Unless you’re courageous. I’m not, but I’d like to be.

Pearl Jaeger is seventeen and homeless after drugs, poverty, and addiction unraveled the life she shared with JJ, her formerly glamorous rock star mother.

This moment of happiness is fleeting; someone will take it from me.

When tragedy brings a chance to start over at an elite boarding school, she doesn’t hesitate. Yet the only salvation comes from an art teacher as troubled as Pearl, and she faces the stark reality that what she thought she wanted isn’t straightforward.

I trace the outline of my reflection in a window. I am no more than a replica of my mother. This is not the self-portrait I want to paint.

Through the friendships she forms at school—especially with Grant, a boy who shows Pearl what it means to trust and forgive—she begins to see a path not defined by her past. But when confronted with the decision to be courageous or to take the easy way forged by her mother’s failures, which direction will Pearl choose?

After reading and loving Deirdre Riordan Hall’s Sugar, I was excited to read Pearl. This was a book that was full of heartache and tough subjects, but it was also beautiful, hopeful, and inspiring.

Pearl hasn’t had an easy life. As the daughter of a has-been rock star who’s more worried about her next fix than about her own daughter, Pearl has been left to fend for herself for a long time. The streets of New York City and her love of fashion are her only escapes. When she and her mother end up homeless, Pearl’s uncle steps in to deal with his sister and send Pearl to boarding school. This is the first opportunity she’s ever had to experience a somewhat normal life, and she’s determined not to mess it up.

This was a very character-driven novel, and Pearl had a great voice. She was smart, creative, observant, and she wanted so badly to find a place she belonged. She absolutely broke my heart at times. It can be hard enough to fit in and have a normal life, but when your past is as rough as hers and you’re worried that’s all you’ll ever be, or worse, that you’ll turn into the very person who made life so difficult, it can seem like a hopeless situation. She was a very real character - she made mistakes, she wanted to be loved, she had varied interests and big dreams, she was sexually active (I appreciated that, and how it was handled - it wasn’t some huge, life-changing thing, it was just a natural part of the story). I connected with her easily, and rooted for her from beginning to end, whether I wanted to give her a big hug or smack her upside the head.

The side characters in the book were equally interesting. Pearl’s new boarding school friend, Sorel, was incredibly volatile. She was like a teenage version of Pearl’s mother, which I suppose is why Pearl didn’t just write her off entirely, even though she should have because she was so toxic and treated Pearl like crap. Despite disliking Sorel and wishing Pearl would stay away from her, I understood why she didn’t, or couldn’t. On the other hand, Pearl’s roommate, Charmindy, ended up being a really great friend. They had little in common and came from completely different backgrounds, but Charmindy taught Pearl a lot about friendship, and it was a truly beautiful thing to watch. I also loved Shale, Pearl’s art teacher, and the lessons he taught her, not just about art, but about life. And then there was Grant...I didn’t think I was going to like him at first, but he grew on me and I ended up loving him. He was exactly the type of guy Pearl needed, and I enjoyed watching their relationship unfold. It wasn’t easy and it wasn’t perfect, but it was realistic, which made their relationship easy to root for.

If you enjoy realistic, character-driven novels with beautiful prose and an overall hopeful message about life, love, forgiveness, and self-discovery, Pearl should be on your to-be-read list. While it deals with tough, often painful subjects, it does so in an open and honest way, and is ultimately a lovely and important coming-of-age story.

 *All quotes taken from the ARC version of Pearl by Deirdre Riordan Spark*

“My uncle doesn’t know Janet hasn’t touched a guitar for years, practically since I was born. She had me around the time when her band left the charts, when junkies traded CDs for cash, and when the sonic landscape as she’d known it became a digital blur. I was like a punctuation mark, the end.” ~ page 7

“Every day, over holiday, make sure you have a brush, a pen, or some implement in your hand, creating, without fail. The only way to get better is to do the work, daily. There are no shortcuts. Not many people realize that.” ~ page 92

“I want to cry, but I’m not sure how that will show him that I’m the rogue to all his sweetness and excellence. I want to rip open my chest and show him everything ugly and beautiful that lives there. All the hurt. All the loneliness. All my desires and dreams. I lack one thing, and that is courage.” ~ page 157

“My body strains to keep up with my mind and my mind with my body. I teeter to the edge of the roof and look down...I feel alone. I am a girl on the edge, on the edge of the past, present, and future, on the edge of love and lust, on the edge of truth and deceit. I tilt forward and back, wavering on heels and inebriation. I look down and then up. Falling is terrifying, but so is flying. A shooting star races through the sky. Just before it disappears, I make a wish and step away.” ~ page 282

“To Pearl, who, like her sisters in the ocean, is beginning to emerge as a beautiful treasure, a gift to herself and a gift to us all.” ~ page 334

Have you read Pearl? What did you think? If you haven't read it, do you plan to? Have you read any of Deirdre Riordan Hall's other books?

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Review: Sugar by Deirdre Riordan Hall

Sugar by Deirdre Riordan Hall
Series: Standalone
Published: June 1st, 2015
Publisher: Skyscape
291 pages (ARC)
Genre: Contemporary young adult
Acquired this book: From the author as a gift, with no expectation of a review
Warning: May contain spoilers
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I’m the fat Puerto Rican–Polish girl who doesn’t feel like she belongs in her skin, or anywhere else for that matter. I’ve always been too much and yet not enough.
Sugar Legowski-Gracia wasn’t always fat, but fat is what she is now at age seventeen. Not as fat as her mama, who is so big she hasn’t gotten out of bed in months. Not as heavy as her brother, Skunk, who has more meanness in him than fat, which is saying something. But she’s large enough to be the object of ridicule wherever she is: at the grocery store, walking down the street, at school. Sugar’s life is dictated by taking care of Mama in their run-down home—cooking, shopping, and, well, eating. A lot of eating, which Sugar hates as much as she loves.

When Sugar meets Even (not Evan—his nearly illiterate father misspelled his name on the birth certificate), she has the new experience of someone seeing her and not her body. As their unlikely friendship builds, Sugar allows herself to think about the future for the first time, a future not weighed down by her body or her mother.

Soon Sugar will have to decide whether to become the girl that Even helps her see within herself or to sink into the darkness of the skin-deep role her family and her life have created for her.

Sugar isn’t an easy book to read. It’s heartbreaking and bittersweet and painful, but it’s also powerful and ultimately full of hope. Besides breaking my heart, it made me angry, it made me uncomfortable, but it also reminded me that with faith, belief in yourself, and strength, anything is possible.

Sugar eats her feelings. Food, especially sweets, calm her down and help feed an insatiable need in her. Her weight, her mama, her brother, and her schoolmates are all part of the problem, and so she continues to eat to feel better, to fill that hole in her life, the ache that can only be satisfied by the one constant in her life: food. Her mother is so morbidly obese she’s bed-bound, her brother is a nasty piece of work with a hair-trigger temper, and the kids at school make sure she never forgets how fat she is, along with how stupid, ugly, and unwanted. Everyone makes her feel like she’s worthless, in the way, and will never amount to anything...until Even comes along. Sweet, gentle, kind Even, who doesn't seem to care that Sugar is an outcast or that she weighs hundreds of pounds. For the first time in her life, Sugar has someone who sees beyond her exterior and likes what they see.

The things Sugar’s mom and brother, along with the kids at school, say and do to her are absolutely disgusting, rage-inducing, and heartbreaking. There were so many times where I just wanted to take Sugar in my arms, hold her tight, and tell her that everything they said was wrong. She was so sweet and tried so hard to please everyone, but she got nothing but grief in return. She was such a good girl - she went to church every week (and not out of obligation), she took care of her horrible, cruel mother, did all the shopping and cleaning and cooking, and tried to do well in school. It’s rare to see a character who’s as good as Sugar without being a goody goody - she was just genuinely good, kind, and had a huge heart, and I loved that about her. 

One thing I really appreciated about this book is that Sugar didn’t lose weight because of or ‘for’ Even. In so many books, a big girl gets attention for the first time and suddenly she wants to lose weight because there’s no possible way she could be beautiful or what a guy wants or needs or deserves if she’s fat. Or a girl does it for revenge against an ex, a bully, or whoever. But with Sugar, she didn’t even realize she was losing weight at first, it just happened because her life was changing - she was walking to school, she didn’t need to ‘eat her feelings’ as much, and she found the satisfaction she used to find in food from Even instead. It eventually became a conscious decision to become healthy, but it was through things she learned and through personal growth rather than for or because of someone specific.

While I did have a couple small issues with Sugar - namely the believability of some things, and the fact that the painful, awful things that happened to Sugar seemed like overkill at times - I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It deals with a lot of serious issues in a mostly realistic way that has the ability to touch you deeply. Despite being heartbreaking, Sugar is ultimately a story of triumph, strength, and hope. 

~Favourite Quote~

“Sugar, I see a beautiful, creative, and intelligent girl. Yes, I see what you look like on the outside and it isn’t what little girls growing up see in magazines and movies or what girls like Hillary and Allie look like either, but if we all looked just alike or worse, acted alike, this world would be a boring place. You’ve got curves. But all of you makes you who you are, and I like that girl. In fact, you’re my favorite person in the world. You have confidence in there, but sometimes I think you just misplace it” ~ page 177
   

    

Want to win an ARC of Sugar, plus a swag pack? Deirdre stopped by The Authorteers, the blog I co-run with a group of author friends, and generously donated an awesome prize pack. You can enter to win here. 

 

 Have you read Sugar? What did you think? If you haven't read it, do you plan to? Have you read any other books with plus-sized main characters? Let's talk here or on Twitter!

  
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Review: The Infinite by Lori M Lee

The Infinite by Lori M Lee 
Series: Gates of Thread and Stone #2
Published: March 10th, 2015
Publisher: Skyscape
378 pages (eARC)
Genre: Young adult fantasy
Acquired this book: Via NetGalley in exchange for honest consideration 

Warning: May contain spoilers

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{Read my review of Gates of Thread and Stone}

Kai always believed the only danger to the city came from within. Now, with a rebel force threatening the fragile government, the walls have become more of a prison than ever.

To make matters worse, as Avan explores his new identity as an Infinite, Kai struggles to remind him what it means to be human. And she fears her brother, Reev, is involved with the rebels. With the two people she cares about most on opposite sides of a brewing war, Kai will do whatever it takes to bring peace. But she’s lost her power to manipulate the threads of time, and she learns that a civil war might be the beginning of something far worse that will crumble not only Ninurta’s walls but also the entire city.

In this thrilling sequel to Gates of Thread and Stone, Kai must decide how much of her humanity she’s willing to lose to protect the only family she’s ever known.

I loved Gates of Thread and Stone. The gorgeous cover drew me in, and then my interest was captivated by the story itself - great characters, mystery, magic, romance, action. There was so much to love about the book, and I was eager to find out what would happen to Kai and her friends and family next. The Infinite was a great sequel. It satisfied my curiosity about what would happen next while skillfully adding in new information, new intrigue, and character development, plus setting things up for the next book.

Things in Ninurta are changing quickly after the huge power shift at the end of the first book. Kai has gone from living a simple life where she and her brother struggled to survive financially to living in the city centre and dealing directly with the people who run the city. When they learn that there are more survivors of the war living in their own city, things change even more.

Kai has a lot to deal with. She’s just found out the truth about her past, who/what she really is, and who her biological family is. She’s torn between worlds, between different groups of people, between family and duty, and between two possible loves. Through it all, though, she’s strong, smart, and fierce. She’s not perfect by any means, and she can be impulsive and even reckless, but I think that’s part of what makes her so great. She would do anything to protect the people she cares about, even if that means putting herself in danger. And it’s those flaws that make her believable and easy to connect with.

The romance, while not a main plot of the book, was much more prominent in Gates of Thread and Stone. The Infinite just had hints of romance, because there was so much else going on. I loved Avan in the first book, so it was hard seeing him not be himself. He’s the same person on the outside, but has none of his memories or old personality traits, and I can only imagine how much it would hurt Kai to interact with the boy who looks like the one she cares about but who can’t even remember her or their past. It made me glad he wasn’t in much of the book, because his interactions with Kai usually just left me sad. I did, however, continue to fall harder for Mason in this book. I loved him in the first book and was torn between him and Avan, but unless Avan somehow gets his memories back, I’m leaning more toward Mason. He and Kai are a good match, they work well together, and they have great chemistry.

With lots of twists and turns, a ton of new information, and plenty of action, The Infinite was a great sequel to Gates of Thread and Stone. I’m curious to see where the story will go from here, what will happen to the characters, and how certain things will get wrapped up.

 

    

Have you read Gates of Thread and Stone or The Infinite? What did you think? If you haven't read them, do you plan to? Let's talk here or on Twitter!

  
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Review: Gates of Thread and Stone by Lori M Lee

Gates of Thread and Stone by Lori M Lee

Series: Gates of Thread and Stone #1

Published: August 5th, 2014

Publisher: Skyscape

335 pages (eARC)

Genre: Young adult fantasy

Acquired this book: Via NetGalley in exchange for honest consideration

Warning: May contain spoilers

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In the Labyrinth, we had a saying: keep silent, keep still, keep safe.

In a city of walls and secrets, where only one man is supposed to possess magic, seventeen-year-old Kai struggles to keep hidden her own secret—she can manipulate the threads of time. When Kai was eight, she was found by Reev on the riverbank, and her “brother” has taken care of her ever since. Kai doesn’t know where her ability comes from—or where she came from. All that matters is that she and Reev stay together, and maybe one day move out of the freight container they call home, away from the metal walls of the Labyrinth. Kai’s only friend is Avan, the shopkeeper’s son with the scandalous reputation that both frightens and intrigues her.

Then Reev disappears. When keeping silent and safe means losing him forever, Kai vows to do whatever it takes to find him. She will leave the only home she’s ever known and risk getting caught up in a revolution centuries in the making. But to save Reev, Kai must unravel the threads of her past and face shocking truths about her brother, her friendship with Avan, and her unique power.

When I read the synopsis of Gates of Thread and Stone, I was really excited. Plus, I mean, that cover is just so beautiful and eye-catching, right? Between the cover and synopsis, I had extremely high hopes for Gates of Thread and Stone, and I’m thrilled to say it lived up to my expectations. This book drew me in from the first page and held my attention right to the last page. It was gripping, exciting, mysterious, and well written, with a tightly woven, inventive plot.

I really liked Kai. She was feisty, smart, and strong. She loved her brother fiercely, and would do anything to make him happy and make life easier. She was a believable teenager - at times insecure, uncertain, selfish, impulsive - definitely flawed, and I loved that. We didn’t see much of Reev, Kai’s brother, but from Kai’s thoughts and memories of him, plus the few glimpses we did get, you were able to get a good sense of the protective, loyal older brother who would do anything to keep his sister safe.

Then there was Avan. Oh Avan. *swoon* I loved him. I loved the will they/won’t they pull between him and Kai, and the slow build of anticipation toward the possibility of something beyond friendship. I alternately sighed and squealed every time they touched, especially as the story went on and things were so uncertain. They had each other when everything was falling apart and even though there were moments I wanted to knock some sense into Kai, I loved these two together.

The world building in this book was fantastic. I was fascinated by the Labyrinth and the world beyond, and was able to picture it all clearly. The whole thing had a dark and creepy post-apocalypse vibe to it. I loved that this book was different from anything I’ve read.

I’ll admit, part of me was hoping this would be a really strong standalone. Up until close to the end I thought it might be, but by the end, I knew there would have to be a continuation. The ending was bittersweet, but I’m hopeful it will get worked out in the sequel, and since I loved these characters so much I’m happy to get the opportunity to see them again.

Gates of Thread and Stone is a fast-paced adventure full of magic and romance. I think this book will appeal to a lot of readers, whether you like fantasy, science fiction, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, or romance. Gates of Thread and Stone has a great concept, and Lori M Lee executed it with finesse. I highly recommend this one. 

 

   

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Review: Kiss the Morning Star by Elissa Janine Hoole

Kiss the Morning Star by Elissa Janine Hoole 
Series: Standalone
Published: May 15th, 2012
Publisher: Marshall Cavendish
240 pages (ebook)
Genre: Contemporary upper YA/NA (LGBT)
Acquired this book: Bought
Warning: May contain spoilers
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The summer after high-school graduation, a year after her mother’s tragic death, Anna has no plans – beyond her need to put a lot of miles between herself and the past. With forever friend Kat, a battered copy of Kerouac’s DHARMA BUMS, and a car with a dodgy oil filter, the girls set out on an epic road trip across the USA. Maybe somewhere along the way they’ll prove or disprove the existence of God. Maybe they’ll even get laid . . .

It’s a journey both outward and inward. Through the Badlands and encounters with predatory men and buffalo. A crazy bus ride to Mexico with a bunch of hymn-singing missionaries. Facing death, naked in the forest with an enraged grizzly bear . . . Gradually, Anna realizes that this is a voyage of discovery into her own self, her own silent pain – and into the tangled history that she and Kat share. What is love? What is sexual identity? And how do you find a way forward into a new future – a way to declare openly and without fear all that lies within you?

 

I’d been wanting to read Kiss the Morning Star ever since I saw the cover almost two years ago. This book was and wasn’t what I was expecting. I was expecting an epic road trip (which I got), hints - or maybe more than hints - at a romance between Anna and Kat (which I got), and lots of self-discovery (which I got). Despite the ‘…prove or disprove the existence of God’ part in the synopsis, it never occurred to me this book would have religious themes, but it did. Normally I give those books a wide berth (with exceptions here and there), so when the girls kept talking about God and religion, I was a bit wary. Imagine my (pleasant) surprise when it turned out the talk about religion was one of my favourite aspects of the book.

Anna’s dad is a minister, so she grew up in the church. Faith was always a huge part of her life. When her mom dies in a horrible accident, Anna and her dad fall apart. They lose their way, and Anna begins to doubt her beliefs. When her best friend Kat asks her to go on a cross-country road trip, she hesitantly agrees, hoping the distance will make things better and put things into perspective.

I love road trip books. The actual journey is always fun - getting to ‘see’ places you’ve never been (or maybe have, which is exciting too), and meet interesting people along the way who help the characters on their journey. But the emotional journey is just as important, if not more important. I thought Hoole did a fantastic job of tying both together in a way that was both fun and poignant. This book was different from a lot of other road trip books in that the girls weren’t taking a journey ‘from somewhere to somewhere else’ - they didn’t have a specific destination in mind, they were just going until they found what they were looking for.

Anna was an interesting character. She was resistant to the idea of ‘finding God’, despite her former life where religion played a huge role. Kat was raised by Atheists, but was open to the idea of finding God. As I said before, even though I tend to avoid books with religious themes, I really liked the girls’ journey to find God. It was as much about finding inner peace, self-acceptance, happiness, and embracing their differences.

I liked that Hoole wasn’t afraid to be bold and push boundaries with this book. It explored sexuality, drug use, religion, grief, and love in its many forms. It wasn’t always comfortable and it wasn’t always easy to read, but I liked that. Grief is a messy thing, and everyone deals with it differently; I thought Anna’s grief was very realistic - the anger, the doubt, the guilt. She numbed herself to so many things and forgot how to really live. The road trip - and Kat - saved her in so many ways, and it was beautiful. 

Kiss the Morning Star is a book that quietly wormed its way into my heart. I wasn’t entirely sure about it at first, but I quickly came to love Anna and Kat, and I felt like I was right there with them on their emotional, spiritual, and physical journey. With some fairly heavy subject matter, this book won’t be for everyone, but if you enjoy beautifully written coming-of-age stories that explore life and love, and are full of humour and emotion, I highly recommend Kiss the Morning Star.

 

 

Have you read Kiss the Morning Star? What did you think? If you haven't read it, is it on your TBR? What are some of your favourite road trip books? How about LGBT books?

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